Smile
by angelbleu
Summary: Sydney's Wedding Day. So why isn't she smiling? Set in the future
1. Default Chapter

Chapter One  
  
Sydney Bristow stares at herself in the full-length mirror. She touches her hair, all done up to make sure everything is in place. She looks at her own image, but somehow, the woman looking back isn't exactly someone that she knows. The woman in the mirror is mature and a serious cloud hangs over her head. What happened to that lively, brilliant girl who could kick any guy twice her size's ass? Trying to be that girl was getting harder and harder every day. She once promised someone that she wasn't going to let darkness overtake her, but she isn't that girl anymore. She has grown up and wants more than anything to just have a normal life. People don't (shouldn't) let their jobs control every single waking moment. People are suppose to be able to tell the truth to their closest friends, and most importantly, people are suppose to love without fear.  
  
Today is supposed to mark the beginning of that life. Today is her wedding day. Her hand travels down the white silky dress as she let's out a sigh. Why is she sighing? Why isn't she all giddy like normal women her age are when they get married? "It's the right time" she repeats to herself over and over again. But always at the end, she tags on "isn't it?" Of course it is. All her friends from High School are all working on their second child and she isn't even married yet. Plus, she isn't getting any younger. Cover- up isn't only good for hiding bruises anymore. After smoothing out the ends of the dress, her hand returns to her neck. So bare, there is simply something missing. Something's missing. This is the most magical day (so she has been told). Only one thing baffles her: why isn't she smiling?  
  
"Hey sweetie," her best friend Francie opens the door "Look at you!" she squealed.  
  
"Hey, " Sydney replied with a forced smile.  
  
"Didn't I tell you you should have your wedding outside. Today is so beautiful. It is just perfect. Everything is just perfect. Your hair, your dress, your husband-to-be." If people didn't know, they would have thought Francie was the one getting married. She was glowing all over. "And have you seen your guy.oh my, is he looking mighty fine today." There she goes with that smile again.  
  
"Actually, I haven't seen him since three days ago."  
  
" Oh well, of course you haven't. You've been busy. And today, well, you two can't see each other just yet."  
  
" You don't actually believe it's bad luck."  
  
" It is I tell you! My cousin, you know the one that's been married four times? Well, she didn't believe any of that stuff.the first three times. And what happened? None of them worked. The last time, she didn't see the groom, and she hasn't called yet looking for a lawyer. Anyway, you are not going to have that problem because nothing is going to ruin wedding or your marriage. You know what Syd? Sometimes I think you have most perfect life." Sydney almost smiled at the irony of Francie's words. If you only knew Francie, she thought to herself.  
  
" You already have the looks and now you're going to have the perfect guy."  
  
" I guess you're right." Sydney sighs again. "Andrew is pretty great."  
  
" Pretty great? He's wonderful!"  
  
" Geez Francie. I never knew you had such a thing for my boyfriend." Sydney teased, but her words were filled with sarcasm, and she didn't know why.  
  
" Well, have you met another man as sweet and caring toward you?"  
  
Sydney quickly turns away. She has. You just don't know him, Sydney thinks. No one knows. No one is suppose to know. Francie senses Sydney's distance.  
  
" Besides Danny I mean," Francie says quietly thinking that is reason Syd's acting all weird on her own wedding day. "Is that what's the matter Syd? Because I'm really sorry. I wasn't thinking."  
  
" Nooo, Francie that's not it. Don't blame yourself."  
  
" Then why do you look like the unhappiest bride in the world?"  
  
" I'm not sure." And that's the honest truth. "I guess it's just cold feet." Sydney thinks, "But should I feel this cold? Andrew is great. He is handsome and sweet. He is from the East, graduated from Georgetown. He is a doctor and his parents seem like very nice parents. He is so normal and that's what I love about him. He gives me normality that other people (person) can't. I won't make the same mistake twice and tell him about what I do. It will be hard, but it's just less complicated and dangerous. I will forever have two lives: Sydney Bristow double agent for CIA and Sydney Bristow the girl that everyone thinks has the perfect life. I am learning that those two lives simply shouldn't be intertwined."  
  
" Sydney? Sydney?" Francies waves her hand in front of Sydney's face.  
  
" Hmmmm?"  
  
" Are you sure you're all right?"  
  
" Yes, thank you." She leans over to give Francie a hug.  
  
" Good, I'll check up on you again later." Francie starts to leave, but turns around quickly. "Oh, I almost forgot. A gift arrived for you this morning. A delivery person said it was a pre-wedding gift. I don't know. I've never heard such a thing. I didn't understand why the person couldn't give it to you as a wedding gift like normal people. Here it is." She hands Sydney a small box.  
  
Sydney takes the box slowly and wonders why someone would give her a gift before the ceremony. Then she understands. She feels a lump in her throat and a tear building under her eyes up as she opens the gift.  
  
"I can't believe he remembered." 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two  
  
Sydney is completely still as she holds the small box in her hands, unable to move her eyes away. She quickly blinks away the tear before Francie sees.  
  
"Uh, Syd? How do you know whom it's from? I haven't even given you the card that goes with it yet."  
  
That snaps Sydney out of her thoughts. Her heart skips a beat as she realizes that there's a card too. Francie hands her a white envelope with her name written neatly on the center. She has never seen his handwriting before, but somehow the pen strokes are familiar. Her name had never looked so special on paper. She extends her shaky hand and reaches for the envelope.  
  
Francie has never seen Sydney like this. Francie may be oblivious to why Sydney devotes her time so much to an insignificant bank job, but she knows her friend on other levels. Even though she doesn't know why, she slowly backs away towards the door because she knows it is the right thing to do at the moment. She opens her mouth to say she'll be back later, but decides that Sydney probably wouldn't even hear her anyway and quietly closes the door behind her.  
  
Sydney puts the box carefully on the nearest table and takes out the card from the envelope. It is a small white card with an angel drawn in silver lining. She takes her index finger and traces the outline a few times and thinks back to a cold night in a huge stadium. The men with guns were well hidden but she sensed them eyeing her every move. She clicked on her earpiece. "Who am I talking to?" Don't let it be that Lambert.  
  
She had never felt so relieved to hear the friendly voice that she thought only a few days ago that she might not ever hear again. " Your invisible friend." How true, she thought. That was the first turning point in their relationship. It was beginning to move from a strictly professional work relationship towards a friendship.  
  
"Good. Where are you?" Please let him be near. Her own thoughts surprised her. It was beginning to register that this wasn't exactly a risk-free operation. She didn't trust Anna or K-directorate, and she certainly didn't trust the men with guns. She wasn't even sure if she could trust the CIA. "Satellite relay station back in LA, watching you from a two hundred mile orbit." Relief went from her head to her toes, which picked her mood right up.  
  
"My guardian angel," she turned her head upward as to really acknowledge him up there in the sky watching over her. She couldn't see him, but she knew he was smiling. "I was going to same the same thing to you."  
  
As the memory draws to an end, Sydney returns to the present. She realizes that she has only been looking at the front of the card. It said so much. She almost laughs at her own stupidity for thinking she had already read the card. She slowly opens the card and reads:  
  
Sydney, To make your special day just a little more perfect- the way you always imagined. Sorry I can't be there. V.  
  
She moves her head from side to side because she couldn't believe he remembered. Then she shakes her head harder at her herself because she couldn't believe she almost forgot that he always listened to everything she said, no matter how insignificant.  
  
It was five months ago, one month after she got engaged to Andrew. They were sitting across from each other in the warehouse. It was one of the shortest debriefings they ever had. The meetings were getting shorter and shorter, and she didn't know how to stop the trend. It was partly because things were at the point of routine. She could almost guess what they wanted her to do even before a Joey's Pizza's call was made. They quickly exchanged business words like a formality. Then they sat uncomfortably in silence. Both knew the meeting was officially over but no one moved. Then he broke the silence.  
  
" Uh, so how is the planning going?" he asked while staring at the dirty floor. At first she was completely taken back by surprise. They hadn't talked about personal things in a long time. She couldn't pinpoint exactly when they stopped sharing little tidbits about their lives outside their jobs, but she had a feeling it was when she and Andrew started becoming a little more serious.  
  
"Um, It's going good.uh, Francie is helping me a great deal. Who needs a planner, when they've got Francie." He chuckled a little back at the floor. "She is so on top of things. I just let her take over. She is a stickler for tradition and superstitious things. I never really cared much about tradition. I don't think anything about me is traditional." She stopped just as she realized she was beginning to babble. It had been so long since she talked to him about things other than SD-6 and missions that she didn't know how to carry on.  
  
" Like what?"  
  
" What do mean like what?"  
  
" Like what type of traditions." He was seriously making an effort to continue this awkward conversation.  
  
" Oh. She says there are certain type of flowers that I have to get. We're going to go look at little bride and groom statuettes tomorrow. And did you know how much goes into seating arrangements? I'm talking serious research into all the guests' history." I'm doing it again, she thought. Stop it.  
  
"I didn't know that. I guess I always imagined a small wedding for myself, not that many guests" he said as he finally lifted his eyes to meet hers.  
  
" Yeah, me too actually," now it was her turn to put her head down and stare at her hands. "But, uh Andrew, unlike myself, has a huge extended family and is a very.sociable.person."  
  
" I see."  
  
"Well, all the traditions aren't bad. I know it's really only done on the day of the wedding, but you know that tradition where the bride is suppose to get something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue?"  
  
He simply nodded. "Um, I know it's silly, but I always wanted one thing for the blue part. When I was six right after my mom died, I lived with my grandmother for awhile before my Dad found a permanent nanny. Anyway, she had this beautiful silver necklace. It had a deep blue stone. If I squinted really hard I could see my little face, it was so clear blue." She paused to remember it exactly. She was off in her own memory world, and he just stared at her staring into space. " There were little diamonds surrounding the blue that sparkled in the light. The darkness of the blue and the light of the white diamonds were in balance. My grandmother said she would give it to me on my wedding day. I always remembered that. Little girls think about their wedding days and all I knew for sure was that I wanted that necklace."  
  
" Is she coming to the wedding?" he asked  
  
She almost forgot he was there she was so wrapped in her own childhood thoughts. "um, no. She died a few years ago of a heart attack. The house was never sold, but a wild fire two years ago burned most of it. I heard that some things on the top floor were still saved, but I couldn't bring myself to go back there."  
  
" I'm sorry," he added quietly.  
  
" It's okay really. I don't know why I brought that up. I just thought if I had that blue necklace, it would just make the day just a little more perfect. You know?"  
  
"Yeah, I know." He did know. He understood it all. The sound of tapping on the door brought her back to reality.  
  
Sydney felt her eyes just to make sure no one saw her crying on her own wedding day, took a deep breath and said, "Come in." 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3  
  
Sydney really wants to be alone right now. She needs to pull herself together, or at least figure out why she is acting the way she is, but it's too late because the words already slipped out of her mouth. "Come in." Oh well she has played many roles, unlike the way she felt at the time, off in far away exotic places; she'll simply have to play along with whoever is at the door.  
  
" Sydney, hope we're not intruding." It is her dad and Will. The two are not exactly what you would call friends, but they have become more than mere acquaintances over the years thanks to Sydney. Since they returned from Taipei three years ago, Will had always been secretly grateful to Jack for coming to get him. Jack, who wanted to work on his own relationship with his daughter, more than ever since they found out about her mother, came by the house more often. Since Will was always over at Sydney's, the three and Francie, had more than a few nights of dinner, talking, and even some friendly games. Sydney had never laughed so hard like the night that her dad learned to play monopoly with them.  
  
" No, I'm really happy you both are here today," Sydney looks at two very important men in her life. She and her dad had come along way since her first engagement. When Danny told her about the "conversation" he had with her father to ask for his blessings, Sydney was so mad that she swore she would not even invite her dad to the wedding. But back then, she hadn't expected anything from him anyway. Now, after working with him and seeing that behind his stoic appearance is a wise man full of love, though he'd never admit it. Sydney had spent so many teenage years resenting her dad that she forgot the special moments they shared when she was young. Those memories of bedtime stories and walks in the park are slowly resurfacing every time they get closer.  
  
" I wouldn't miss your wedding day for anything," her dad says seriously looking into her eyes. Then his eyes light up with a smile, "Besides, who would walk you down the aisle?" he teases.  
  
" Will could," she teases back. "Isn't that right Will?" she nudges him in the ribs.  
  
" Oh no, nope!" Will shakes his head violently. " I already got suckered into decorating and entertainment for the reception by Francie's oh so persuasive method of threatening to beat me up. I wouldn't want Jack to beat me up for real if I took his place by giving his daughter away" Everyone laughs at that. Will just knows how to liven up the place.  
  
" Mr. Tippin, I would not beat you up. I am above that," Jack returns to his cool demeanor.  
  
" Jack, you can call me Will, and that's good to know," Will is relieved.  
  
" I would simply have my men dressed up in black ski-masks take you while you were sleeping."  
  
Jack gives them his signature straight serious face and Sydney tries to stifle a laugh. Will swallows hard and then gives into laughing along. Sydney feels a little better. This is the way it's supposed to be she thinks. Having her dad and her best friend cracking jokes on her wedding day.  
  
" Speaking of entertainment and music. I, uh, didn't really do my homework and I don't know what to play for your song."  
  
" Oh, Andrew and I don't really have a song," Sydney replies slightly embarrassed.  
  
" What?" Will eyes suddenly become twice their normal size. " How can you not have a song? You better think of one fast."  
  
" Why don't you pick one for me." Sydney says with a shrug.  
  
" Uh, okay. I'm not sure that's the best idea. I remember you specifically telling me I have no taste in music." Will thinks that Sydney is acting a little weird. Sydney is the most decisive woman he knows. She knows exactly what she wants and yet she doesn't even care for the most important song of the night. " Um, tell you what. I have a few choices right here I could play for you right now. We'll get this done quickly."  
  
"Alright, let's hear them." Sydney says as she gets comfortable in a nearby couch. She wraps her arm around her dad's to make him sit right next to her.  
  
" I think this is actually a really good one. My older sister had it at her wedding. Get this: it's French too."  
  
The music starts playing. First the instrumental and then the voices of a woman and a man slowly gets louder and clearer. Louder and clearer.This is slightly familiar, Sydney thinks to herself. "Where have I heard it?" she wonders in her head. Then the realization hits her and for the second time today she feels tears coming on as she remembers a nightclub in Paris.  
  
She was on a mission in Paris to get another Rambaldi artifact, a unique ring with the famous symbol engraved on the inside. The man who had the ring didn't know the true value of the ring, but was told by his father to always keep it on him. That night he was entertaining guests at a Paris nightclub. Sydney was going to find him, get his attention, and switch the ring with a fake one while they were dancing. That night, another CIA agent would be at the club ready to switch the ring again the same way Sydney obtained the ring. She would recognize him because he would be wearing shaded glasses. He was suppose to look innocent and blind so no one would suspect him. Sydney remembered thinking it would be an easy mission, but she didn't know how unforgettable it would actually be.  
  
The night was going perfectly as planned. The man with the ring was a scumbag like all the other ones she dealt with, but his attention was easily gotten. One look at Sydney's skin-tight red dress with a slit that ran up her right thigh and he was hooked. She felt disgusted by his forwardness. He looked like a weasel, a hungry one too. "Let's just get this over with quick," Sydney thought. It was a little pep talk, but it prepared her. When they danced, all she could think about was a shower to wash everywhere he touched. Once she switched the rings, that was it. No more Ms. Let-you-do-anything-you wanted. As she moved away from his grasp, he pulled her tighter. Luckily, she didn't have to resort to violence because another woman came up from behind him and threw a punch for her. Sydney couldn't help but laugh at the sight. She assumed the woman was either his wife or girlfriend, who was not so happy at his public displays of affection with other women. Sydney slipped quietly away towards the other side of the nightclub.  
  
Half of the mission was completed. Now, in search for Mr.CIA-with- sunglasses so she can get the other half done as quickly as possible. She gazed around the room, but with all the cigarette smoke in the room, it is a wonder she could see anything within five feet of her. Where was he? She was beginning to think that she got the description wrong. A blind man with sunglasses. That shouldn't be that hard to find. Then she heard the two women next to hear talking in French.  
  
" It has been a bore tonight. No one worth our time here."  
  
" I don't know Cecile. There was one man in particular. He was tall and looked great in a suit."  
  
" Yeah? Well, why aren't you with him? "  
  
" He didn't seem interested. Besides, I think he is blind."  
  
" Too bad."  
  
" Yes, I don't know where he is now, but last I saw him, he was by the bar."  
  
"Hmmmm," Sydney thought and headed toward the bar. There was a man there with his back to her. That has got to be him. Even though she hasn't seen his face yet, the back certainly looked.appealing. What? Did she just think that? She quickly reprimanded herself. She was on a mission, not here to pick up guys. Anyway, it was probably the smoke getting into her eyes to blur her vision. She walked up to him and tapped him on the shoulder.  
  
" Monsieur, would you like to dance?" she said in French.  
  
He turned around, and there were the sunglasses covering his eyes. Then she gasped. Oh my gosh! This was not just any CIA agent. Even though it was dark, the room was smoky, and his eyes were hidden, she knew it was him. She was stunned, but didn't want to draw any attention towards them.  
  
" I'd be delighted," he answered with a smile. "Will you lead the way?" Of course, she thought. He was pretending to be blind. She took his hand in hers and moved to the dance floor. Once they were close enough so no one could hear, she dropped her act.  
  
" What are you doing here?"  
  
" Excuse me, I don't know what you're talking about Mademoiselle."  
  
" Vaughn.what is going on?" she glared at him.  
  
Acting completely shocked he answered smoothly, " Who is this Vaughn? We have never met before. Simply two strangers."  
  
So, this is the way he wants to play, she thought. Fine I can play along. " And who might you be?"  
  
" Just your average blind French man." She couldn't stay mad at him anymore and let out a sigh. " Who might you be?" he asked her in return.  
  
" Just your average American woman."  
  
Then a very slow song started playing in the background. A man and a woman sang a duet. He took both her wrists, one in each hand, pulled her in, and put them around his neck drawing her closer. Sydney took a deep breath as his hands moved to her waist. She breathed in his scent and closed her eyes as her head fell on his shoulder. They have never been this close before. Her heart pounded so fast she thought she could feel it in her throat.  
  
" Just your average American woman? Really?.I think not," he whispered into her ear and she blushed. She was beginning to feel warm and dizzy. " What does your average American woman look like?"  
  
She let go of her grasp and reached down for his hand. She slowly brought it up to her face and let her hand go while his remained still. His touch on her face was so gentle, she could barely feel it. But she knew it was there because she felt heat everywhere he touched. He glided his hand across her eyes as she closed them. She hoped he didn't feel the wetness under her eyes. Then he stroked the back of his hand across her cheek sending shivers down her spine. Finally he used his index finger to outline her full lips.  
  
"You're beautiful," he whispered and she swallowed hard. They stopped talking and simply swayed against each other to the music. It felt so right and perfect at that moment that she didn't realize she was holding on tighter and tighter with each passing second until he cleared his throat and whispered, " I think you have something for me,"  
  
Those words brought her back to the mission at hand. She let one arm stay around his neck while the other reached down into her purse to get the Rambaldi ring. She kept it well hidden as she moved her hands down the arms of his suit and slipped the ring into his pocket. He then reached down into the other pocket and took out the fake ring. He took her hand in his and passed the ring into her palm as he took her hand and brought it to his lips. " Thank you for the dance," and he turned away as the song ended. The room just seemed to fade.  
  
" Well Syd, what do you think? Syd? Do you like the song?" Will asks.  
  
" No!" she cried in alarm and blinked at the tears. She shocked Will and her dad with her sudden outburst. " I mean, I uh, I think we should go with a English song for the, uh, guests." She's all flustered and has to think quick. " Just, just go with 'At Last' That's um a nice normal wedding song."  
  
" Okay.um.that's a great song," says Will. He went up to her and asks, " Are you alright?"  
  
" Yeah, Fine."  
  
" Could you be a little more convincing and smile for me?" She gives another forced smile and he has to leave it like that. Will gives her a quick kiss on the cheek and with a " I'll get working on it," he leaves the room.  
  
Sydney slumps back down on the couch. " Sydney, what's wrong?" her dad asks in a concerned fatherly manner.  
  
" I just don't know." 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
" Sydney, what's wrong?" her dad asks with a concerned voice.  
  
" I just don't know." She wants so badly to cry on his shoulder like she did when she was six years old and fell off a pony and scraped her knee. He had been there to help her get right back on. Instead, she doesn't want him to worry so much about her.  
  
" Dad, do you remember your wedding day?"  
  
Jack turns his back to her and looks out the window. Sydney suddenly feels terrible to have asked him such a question. She knows that he tries desperately to forget the hurtful past with her mother. She wants to take it back, but it's too late and she secretly really wants to know his answer. He tilts his head and the memory of over thirty years back flashes before him like still frames of a movie passing right before his eyes.  
  
" I remember it perfectly," he finally says with a sigh. "Every second."  
  
" Really?"  
  
" There weren't that many people, just a priest. Your mother convinced me that we didn't need anyone else at our wedding. At the time, she said that 'it would be like our own little secret moment.' But now, thinking back, it was probably because she didn't have anyone to invite. Her whole history had been a lie. She couldn't let people come to the wedding if they didn't exist. I was naïve and let her have her way."  
  
" Dad, don't do that to yourself. You couldn't have known," Sydney places her hand gently on her dad's arm.  
  
" Well, it didn't matter because, in a way, she was right. You really only need two people. The two who share a love that makes them want to declare to the whole world that they are like one. It's nice to share with others, but not essential. Anyway, it was very intimate. She wore a slim white silk dress with long strands that you had to tie in the back. I actually had to help her into her dress because no one else was there. I was not very good at lacing the strands and actually ripped one of them. You know, my hands are very skilled with guns but terrible with women's clothing." He turned back to see if Sydney had cracked a smile, and she did.  
  
" What did you do?"  
  
" Well, first, we laughed until our stomach hurt for a few minutes and then I was gentleman like and gave her my suit jacket to wear. A few other things didn't go our way that day. We didn't make it out to be a grand occasion. Simple, but special. We didn't even have music. When she walked down to meet me, she had to hum the wedding march to herself. When we made eye-contact, she gave me a look as if playfully threatening me to hum with her or she would hurt me. Then at that moment, I felt like the happiest man alive because I knew I had found her. " He stops suddenly trying to compose himself. The memory was sweet and painful at the same time.  
  
" Did you feel, I don't know, unsure, um, about anything?" Sydney was not being very articulate today.  
  
" Of course there was the usual amount of apprehension about the future. But Sydney, there is uncertainty in everything. You should know that by now. It was just nerves I guess," Jack smirks. To think of himself being scared of anything, let alone marriage, made him almost laugh. " It wasn't, how should I put it, dread, but nerves of excitement. Not knowing what the future held."  
  
" Yeah, you said mom was the one. How were you so sure?"  
  
" Now after thirty-some years, I am not so sure why I was so sure. Did you know that when I first met your mother, I was dating someone else at the time?"  
  
" No, I didn't." At the first initial moment of hearing her father's words, she felt surprised, but then remembered that she doesn't really know that much about her father's past. They were working on their relationship, but haven't gotten to the point of sharing everything.  
  
" Yes Sydney. I did, date, other women before your mother. Her name was Sara. We knew each other for a really long time and started seeing each other when mutual friends suggested we would be a good match. And we were, but everything was the way it was suppose to be. There was no excitement. There were no obstacles. We settled into routine quickly. On the outside we seemed like the perfect couple that never argued. With your mother, there was always something special. She challenged my ideas and everything I thought I knew. She made me see new perspectives. Of course I didn't know everything was planned. I thought everything she did was spontaneous."  
  
" Do you regret your decision to end things with Sara?"  
  
Jack had to think hard, and finally he answered. " No. If I had stayed with Sara and did eventually end up marrying her. I would have settled for normality."  
  
" But, isn't that something you would want with your life being so messed up with the CIA?" That's what I would want, she thought.  
  
" Sydney, when you lead the life of a CIA agent, you need to be motivated to do the things you do. If you settled all the time, slowly your drive would diminish and then disappear. You don't really want to settle when you can have something greater. The times when I wanted normality, I still got it with your mother. I'd like to think that when we were together, there were times when it wasn't always about our jobs."  
  
Sydney nods her head slowly as she tries to remember times of her mother and father together.  
  
" I remember times when it couldn't have been her job to do the things she did," Jack adds on to give Sydney more confidence about her mother.  
  
" Me too. Thanks dad." Sydney reaches out and gives her dad a tight hug.  
  
" Are you sure about this?" Jack asks pointing to her dress, but really meaning this whole wedding occasion.  
  
Sydney thinks for awhile and finally gets the courage to share her doubts with her dad. " Do you think I'm trying to settle?"  
  
" I can't answer that."  
  
Sydney just nods her head. " I'll give you some more time by yourself," he says heading toward the door. " But don't take too long. Unlike my wedding, you actually have guests."  
  
" Don't worry, I won't be too long," she turns her head to follow him out the door.  
  
Sydney returns to mirror but drifts off to thinking about her mom and dad and their wedding. Wow, Sydney thought about the story. It doesn't seem like it could be true. She always remembered her parents were happy when she was young, but she never knew how much her Dad truly loved her mother. Slowly, with that same realization, her inside began to fill with anger. How could her mother use him like that? Not really loving someone, but marrying that person pretending the whole time, was simply cruel.  
  
She reaches for the box on the table and takes out the necklace as she hears the door slowly open behind her.  
  
" Dad, I said I wouldn't take that long. I just need to put one more thing on."  
  
There is a cleared throat, " um. It's not Jack." 


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5  
  
Sydney's ears immediately perk up at the sound of his voice. She is extremely surprised that he would come, after all, didn't he just write a note apologizing that he couldn't come? But secretly deep down, she was hoping he would. Remember to breathe she thought to herself over and over again. All she could manage out was a soft, "hi."  
  
" Hi." he says just as quietly. He remains standing at the doorway, unsure of whether or not to step inside.  
  
She still has her back to him, but she can still see part of his legs in bottom left corner of the mirror. " I thought you said you weren't going to be here." Please tell me that you're here to tell me something, her mind prayed unconsciously.  
  
He sighs and replies, " Yeah, I wasn't."  
  
" Oh," she tries to use a nonchalant tone, but it comes out with an air of sadness.  
  
" I thought it was going to be too hard."  
  
" Yeah, you're right. It's probably very difficult to come up with a good cover for you being here. Plus, Sloane is here as a guest and. " she starts to babble on.  
  
" No, that's not it. It's hard, for other reasons, I mean. Jack did offer me a cover as a relative who you had lost touch with, but was in the area." It is hard to believe that Jack would offer Vaughn an opportunity like that knowing the risks involved. If anyone from SD-6 security section found out that Sydney had any contact with the real CIA, her cover may be blown. Jack had seen the friendship his daughter shared with her handler and knew it was special. He, too, wanted her day to be the best and finally pulled some strings. A week ago, Jack came by Vaughn's office and handed him an envelope. Inside, was a profile with Vaughn's picture, but the information was different. The place of birth, the birthdate, parents names, occupation, hobbies, interests, and even age was of another man. Most importantly it said: distant relative of Jack Bristow from his father's side. Then at the bottom, in Jack's handwriting, it read: " If you want to be there, you may find this information useful."  
  
" He did?" she feels grateful that her dad actually thought about everything when it interested her. In the back of her head, she will remember to thank him.  
  
" Yes. But I'm not going to use it. Because I am not staying."  
  
She nods her head up and down and asks, " Then why are you here?" It is the question she has wanted to ask since he came in, but was fearful of the answer. She begins to have an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. She knows that everything, everything she has planned for the past six months, could change if he answers with the right words.  
  
Vaughn hangs his head down. Why is he here? He has been asking himself one question his whole way here. While leaving his apartment, while driving, while walking down the hall, while opening the door, he thought, " Why are you doing this?" He woke up in the morning determined not to end up in the place he currently is at.  
  
After not getting a wink of sleep the night before, this morning he took a quick shower wishing that his clustered mind would just relax. Surprisingly, the shower did relax his body. He settled down on the couch, and as his eyes were closing shut, there was a knock on the door. It was Weiss.  
  
" Hey man, how you been?" Vaughn shot him a look like, don't tell me I don't look like hell. " That good?" Weiss joked.  
  
" I haven't been getting much sleep the past few days. A lot on my mind."  
  
" Those pills I gave you didn't work their magic? Funny, they always work for me. You know what your problem is buddy? You think too much. WAY too much. It's not good for your health. Have you been checking your blood pressure? "  
  
" Thanks" Vaughn said back sarcastically.  
  
" Anyway, where's Donovan?" Vaughn pointed to the kitchen. Donovan was guarding a sports bag with his stuff inside. " So..it's the big day."  
  
" Yeah."  
  
" You're sure about this now?" Weiss gave him raised eyebrows.  
  
" I've gone over it all in my head a million times. The pro's and the con's."  
  
" Well, you know she just might hate you for this."  
  
" No, she'll get over it. She's starting a new life."  
  
" She never said she wanted the old one completely gone." Weiss challenged him again with his eyebrows. When they got particularly stressed with work and wanted to act like boys sometimes, they'd have stupid contests. A particularly favorite one was the eyebrow challenges. Vaughn won more times because he could raise his eyebrows separately and Weiss couldn't. Weiss did work on it though. But usually the challenges just end up with laughing fits and a tie. Though silly, it does its job and releases the stresses they've had.  
  
" Don't give me that Eric. It's just easier for everyone. Okay?"  
  
" Everyone?"  
  
" Fine! Me! Okay?" Vaughn was suddenly not in control of his emotions. " It's easier for me if I do this. You're happy now? I said it. It's all for me."  
  
" Whoa, no need to take my head off. The only way I'd be happy is if you're happy, and I'm not sure what you're doing is going to make you happy."  
  
" It may not seem like it now, but it will."  
  
" So, you're not even going to tell her?" That's what he spent all last night thinking about. It got him no where with the fact that her face kept popping up every few minutes.  
  
" If she hates me, it may be better when she meets her new handler."  
  
" Of all the days, you pick this one. I don't think it's a coincidence. When was the last time you guys spoke?"  
  
" Two and a half weeks ago. She hasn't been sent on many missions because of the preparations."  
  
" That isn't a short time. Do you even remember what she still looks like?" Weiss meant it as a joke, but it scared Vaughn like crazy. His felt a sudden pang inside his chest. After that comment, he let his body move without even thinking until he arrived at the door.  
  
Sydney couldn't take his silence anymore and she asks again in an annoyed tone, " Well.why are you here then?"  
  
" Because." silence again. " Because, I wanted to see you as just Sydney Bristow one last time. After today, you may be some other Sydney," he tells her solemnly. 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6  
  
" What do you mean?" Sydney is confused by his reply.  
  
He runs his fingers through his hair, still a little damp from the morning shower. " I mean that you may be Sydney Davidson when the day's over."  
  
" I'm not going to change my name, if that's what you mean," she's still unclear at what he's trying to say. She is afraid that if he elaborates, she's not going to like what she hears.  
  
" I know. But you'll be. . .different. You won't be just Sydney Bristow anymore. You'll be Sydney and Andrew, or Andrew and Sydney. I just wanted to see Sydney Bristow one more time." and his voice drifts away as his hand moves to stable himself on the door frame. Just saying those words for some reason took a lot out of him.  
  
" I am still the same person. What's a name? I've had countless aliases."  
  
" Yeah, but all those times you were playing someone else. This is you. This is your new life. with Andrew." Sydney let's out a sigh of frustration. Why does he keep saying Andrew's name?  
  
" Fine. You're right. It's time for change. Time to move on." Suddenly a déjà vu flashed before her eyes. Those exact words were uttered out of her mouth six months ago. That day was a week since Andrew proposed on bended knee by a park bench after their routine jog. It wasn't the most romantic since both their bodies wanted to give out and they were covered in sweat, but it certainly surprised her. She didn't know what to say and he saw the hesitation in her eyes. She asked him to give her a few days to think about it. He said of course, but asked in return if she would wear the ring while she thought about it, and she agreed.  
  
That night Francie's sharp eagle eyes went straight to Sydney's hand, and she went completely off the walls. She was extremely excited because she was the one who had introduced Sydney to Andrew. Andrew was Francie's doctor after she was in a small car accident. When Sydney came to visit Francie, Francie saw sparkle in Andrew's eyes when he saw Sydney. She told Francie that she hasn't accepted yet. It soothed her to have her friend's support. She wasn't sure how Will would react.  
  
His reaction to her and Danny's engagement at the track was something she had not expected or prepared herself for. To her surprise, Will was on the same boat as Francie. He had met up with his high school sweetheart a few months back and they had rekindled a romance that was never completely gone. There is a part of him that will always have deep feelings for Sydney; he just wanted her to be happy. He knew her life was hard being a double agent and Andrew seemed good for Sydney. She told her dad the next day when they went out for dinner. He too seemed genuinely supportive. With all these people wanting her to answer "yes," she was beginning to feel more sure. She just didn't know how to bring the subject up with one particular person. She wasn't entirely sure she even wanted to tell him.  
  
As she walked in the warehouse for a counter-mission session, she began to feel nervous. She looked at her hands and they were jittery. Her eyes caught sight of the ring and she quickly slipped it off and into her suit pocket. She couldn't go through with it and she didn't know why. That night wasn't the right night to say anything.  
  
" Hey," he smiled as he stood up from the chair he was sitting in.  
  
" Hey," she gave a nervous smile back.  
  
" Is everything okay?" how could he always sense something was not right with her?  
  
" Yeah, everything fine." She couldn't help but lie, and she felt terrible for it. He was the only person she promised she wouldn't lie to.  
  
" Alright. How much time can you stay tonight?"  
  
" Um.Francie's working overtime, Will's out with his girlfriend, and Andrew is at his mother's for the weekend. So, I don't have plans. Why?"  
  
" Well." he moved aside and gestured for her to look at the table, which was filled gadgets of all sizes.  
  
" What are.."  
  
" Those are the latest gadgets still in experimental stages. The CIA sometime needs agents to try and work out some new technology before they let everyone use it. I, uh, volunteered us to try it out. I hope that's okay."  
  
" Oh, sure. That's completely fine. It'll be like trying new clothes." They both chuckled. He gave her the counter-mission for her operation in Venice and started to explain how each new technology worked. He stopped at a certain one with a whole lot of wires.  
  
" This is one that you will actually be wearing for this next mission."  
  
Sydney looked skeptically at all the tangled wires on the gadget. " It's not that discreet. How does it work?"  
  
" Well, it kind of wraps around in your clothes. It'll be hidden if it is put in the right places." Then he took the black base and handed it in her hands. She took the attached wires and started hooking it in places on her suit. She was having a difficult time figuring out where everything went. She usually had a person help her with where the wires go whenever she went on a mission with Dixon. Vaughn watched her fiddle with the wires and let out a laugh when she got all tangled up.  
  
" Uh.I don't think I'm doing this right." Sydney gave him a frustrated look and blew a lose strand of hair out of the way.  
  
" Here, I'll try and help." He walked up to her and untangled her clothes. She just stood there still as he worked around her. She lifted her arms when he needed to put the wire into the lining of her suit. She felt like she was a little girl and someone was helping her dress. At the thought of him trying to help her dress, she felt her cheeks heat up and quickly shook the thought away. His head was right under her nose and she could smell the shampoo he used. It was a puzzle to him where everything went also, but he tried to hide it. His hands moved up and down, inside and out of her suit. When he was almost done, he took a step back to examine.  
  
" I think I've almost got it. You can't really tell where the wires are. Just one more place." He took the base of the device from her hand and put his hand in her pocket to secure it in place. All of a sudden he felt something. Sydney watched his expression change. "Oh no!" she thought. He found it. He slowly took the engagement ring out and swallowed really hard.  
  
" um." she didn't know what to say.  
  
" Congratulations," he gave her a forced smile. "I didn't know you guys were that serious."  
  
" Well we."  
  
" That's great." he could hardly cover the hurt in his voice, but he tried. " I'm really happy for you guys."  
  
" I." Sydney didn't know if she should say that she hasn't accepted yet. But he seemed to jump to the conclusion that she had.  
  
" It's time for you to move on. You probably always really wanted a family. Does, um, Sloane know?"  
  
" No.he." Let me get a few words out please, she thought, but he beat her to it.  
  
" I don't want to hurt you, but you know, that you can't say anything to him.like with Danny." He couldn't control his words. He was very flustered. When he discovered the ring, he almost blocked her out. He wouldn't let her tell him how Andrew proposed, how happy she is with Andrew. He didn't know if he could take it, so he kept interrupting her.  
  
" I know."  
  
" Why is it hidden in your pocket? You should wear it." He was acting very funny and unlike himself. He quickly takes her hand and slips the ring onto her finger.  
  
" Vaughn."  
  
" Well.congratulations again. It's time you moved on." He said quickly.  
  
" Yeah," she said in a defeated voice. "You're right. It's time for change. Time to move on."  
  
" I have to go. Good luck . . in Venice. .and with everything else too." Then he just walked off leaving her clutching the ring in her hand. That night when Andrew called, she accepted his proposal. That night, she cried herself to sleep. She wants to clear her head of that night and draws her attention back.  
  
" Well, when you see me next. I hopefully won't be that different," she turns her head to face him for the first time today. No one moved. Her eyes travels from staring at his eyes to focus in on his mouth.  
  
" Um. When I said I wanted to see you as Sydney Bristow one last time. I also meant something else. I meant that. . I won't be see you much. Because I'm leaving. " He didn't want those words to come out because he was afraid of what she would say. That's why he wasn't planning on coming today. Not only would it be so painful to watch her marry someone else, he wouldn't know if he'd have the courage to leave if she asked him to stay. 


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7  
  
Those two plain words echo inside Sydney's head. I'm leaving. I'm leaving. I'm leaving. They get louder and louder until she feels dizzy. " What?" she finally lets out.  
  
" I'm leaving for Barcelona. There is an op that I have been following for the last few years. They need another agent there, and I volunteered."  
  
" Oh," her mouth drops open a little as her mind races. When has he been doing this? She always thought she was his only assignment.  
  
As if he could read her mind, he adds on, " it is an op that my dad started; it has been developing since he died," He hopes that would satisfy her because he is prohibited and really does not want to elaborate.  
  
The subject of his father has been a touchy one for them before. She understands and doesn't ask for more details about the operation. She just wants to know more about him. " When are you leaving?" she quietly asks.  
  
" Tonight." Tonight? Sydney does a double-take. Less than twelve hours? And he'll be off to the other side of the world?  
  
" For how long?"  
  
" I don't know. As long as they need me. Could be months. Years. Or even longer."  
  
" Or longer? Meaning what? Forever?" Sydney thinks out-loud. She doesn't even realize that her voice, which was mouse-like a few seconds ago, is now loud and filled with frustration.  
  
" I don't know."  
  
" And you weren't even going to tell me?" She is now on the verge of shouting.  
  
" I'm telling you now," he says back equally loud, but with more composure.  
  
" But you weren't planning to! You were just going to leave for God-knows how long! When was I going to find out? When I arrived at the warehouse tomorrow for a meeting and someone else was there?" she asks with irritation in her voice.  
  
" You wouldn't be at the warehouse tomorrow . . ." he starts up.  
  
" Were you even going to write a letter?" she questions.  
  
" Or for the next month. . . " he continues.  
  
They talk over each other and ramble on their own.  
  
" to explain anything? Or were you. . . " Her words speed up.  
  
" for that matter. You would be off . . ." His voice matches hers.  
  
Neither one is listening to what the other is saying.  
  
" just going to move on and forget . . ."  
  
" with your husband . . ."  
  
" LA and EVERYTHING. . ." Her arms go up and down for emphasis. And at the same time, he lets the last few words of frustration out of his mouth.  
  
" on your HONEYMOON!" After the words leave his mouth, he immediately regrets it. He talks about her marriage as if it is a terrible thing. He says those words like he wants to hurt her. It is the first time he shows exactly how he feels about her getting married to someone else. It was low, but he couldn't control himself.  
  
That silences her.  
  
" I'm sorry," he immediately apologizes. " I just didn't want to ruin anything for you."  
  
"A little too late for that," she thinks to herself.  
  
"This isn't how I wanted this to go. I wanted to do it the right way," he explains apologetically. Her expressions start to soften again.  
  
" I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have questioned what you are going to do. It's probably very important to you. I just never thought you'd leave." Sydney quickly realizes how much she had taken him for granted these few years. She seriously never thought he'd leave, and that he'd always be there. Always.  
  
" I thought it would be a good time since you're starting over too. I want you to be happy."  
  
" Vaughn . . ."  
  
" I came here to see you and to tell you that for past few years, just knowing you, has been one of the best things in my life." He watches for her reaction.  
  
Sydney chokes back her tears. " For me too," she adds. Then there's just silence. They stare at each other hoping the other would speak more, but each afraid to say anything themselves.  
  
Finally, Vaughn decides to change the mood. " Did you . . . uh. . .get the gift?" He tries to give her a lop-sided smile.  
  
" Yeah. Thank you." She walks to the table to retrieve the gift that she was just about to put on before he came in. " Will you? " she holds out the delicate piece of jewelry to him. He nods and takes the necklace gently from her palm.  
  
She turns around to face the mirror again. She lifts her right hand to pull up the light strands of hair exposing her long neck. He walks slowly up to her back and is only inches away. He drapes the blue stone and diamonds in front so it goes just beneath her collarbone. The necklace is cool against her skin. But her neck is immediately warm by the touch of his hands. All of a sudden, the hairs on her neck start to tingle. The funny sensation occurs whenever the back of his hand brushes against her skin as he tries to clasp the ends of the necklace.  
  
He leans in close so she can feel his breath near her neck and she closes her eyes. After he secures the chain, he lets his fingers linger on the back of her neck as he looks in the mirror at their reflections. They look so perfect together. As his eyes stay mesmerized by the image in front of him, his mind drifts to wondering what a wedding picture of them would look like, and unconsciously his hands move to her waist and pulls her back against him. With one fluid motion, his arms come together in front of her stomach and give her a tight but gentle squeeze. With her eyes closed, she allows herself to fall back into him and leans her head back to rest against his shoulder. Her ears just happen to fall right near his mouth, so she can hear his barely audible, " you're the most beautiful bride I've ever seen."  
  
She almost giggles and replies with a teasing voice, " And how many other brides have you seen?"  
  
He bends his head down even closer to her and whispers, " just one," and lets his lips just barely touch her neck. " In my dreams . . ." he adds as his mouth traces down and grazes her bare shoulder. Then as gently and quietly as he could, he slips away, leaving her in her own reveries.  
  
She lets out a contented sigh and opens her eyes, but he's gone. She immediately rushes out the door yelling, " Vaughn. . ."  
  
But when she looks down the hallway, there is no one.  
  
  
  
A/N: I hope the part where they begin to talk over each other wasn't too confusing. It was difficult to write/ convey that they were talking at the same time. Hope it was semi-clear. If not, I'm clearing that up now. Thanks again for everyone who is reading and responding. 


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8  
  
She looks frantically in both directions, but finds nothing. No one. As her head drops down, her whole body feels like giving out right there in the doorway. The longing that rushed through her mind and body just moments before were ones in which she hasn't felt in a long time. A minute ago, she was ready to tell him everything, but now she's not so sure since he just fled out of there. How can he just leave? Now and possibly forever? What if he doesn't feel the same way? Of course he does, why else would he acts like this? But maybe him moving on is the best thing for him? But doesn't it matter what she wants? Why is she being so selfish? Ahhhhh! Sydney is so confused, she just wants to scream.  
  
" Sydney . . ." All of a sudden a voice comes from behind her. She whips her head around to face her dad and Francie. " It's time," he says pointing to his watch.  
  
" Your man is getting impatient," Francie adds with a big smile.  
  
" Uh . . . " Sydney tries to gain some composure, " I . . . I'm not ready yet."  
  
" Sydney sweetie, you look absolutely wonderful. There's no more to get ready about," Francie swings around to grab Sydney's arm.  
  
" No, I don't mean physically. I'm not sure I'm ready."  
  
" Everyone is like that just seconds before. With all risks, sometimes you just have to take that extra step, that leap of faith," Jack's words of wisdom have been flowing out so easily today.  
  
" Exactly. When you step outside and see the man of your dreams waiting, you'll know and you'll be ready," Francie is now clinging tightly to her arm and dragging her towards the outside where guests and the groom have been patiently waiting.  
  
***********************  
  
Slipping away from holding her has been the hardest thing he had ever had to do. Vaughn could have stayed like that forever. But he knew he couldn't. It wouldn't be fair to her, he thinks. As he leaves the door, he starts walking faster and faster down the hall until it is almost a sprint. He just has to get out of there fast! He suddenly stops in his tracks at the sound of her voice. He could have sworn he had just heard her call out his name. As he heads back to her dressing room, he sees her with her father and Francie. He immediately reprimands himself for thinking that she had urgently called out his name.  
  
Now, he just feels stupid. Oh no, they are walking towards him. He quickly rushes outside, sees the exact place where the ceremony would take place, and hides behind a tree before they could see him. Isn't it convenient that she would have an outside wedding?  
  
Everyone stands as the bride's maid of honor walks down the aisle, smiling graciously to everyone. Then the music starts as the bride and her father are at the end of the aisle ready to proceed. Leave now! Vaughn's head is telling him, but his feet does not move. His eyes stay glued to her back.  
  
Luckily for Sydney, the musicians picked a very slow tempo to play the wedding march. She stands there, unable to move her feet while her whole body tenses up. Her father pulls her closer to his side and whispers, " breathe. It should feel more natural than this." She lets out a huge sigh as she allows him to guide her along. All the while in her head, words and voices echo all over . . .  
  
Why do you look like the unhappiest bride in the world? . . .  
  
Don't settle . . .don't settle . . .  
  
Could you be a little more convincing and give me a smile? . . .  
  
I'm leaving for Barcelona . . . I'm leaving.  
  
Everything is just perfect . . .  
  
You don't really want to settle when you can have something greater . . .  
  
I wanted to see you as just Sydney Bristow one last time . . .  
  
With all risks, sometimes you just have to take that extra step, that leap of faith . . .  
  
I'm leaving . . .could be years . . .or longer . . .  
  
Don't settle . . .don't settle . . .  
  
You're the most beautiful bride I've ever seen . . .  
  
When you step outside and see the man of your dreams waiting, you'll know and you'll be ready . . .  
  
To make your special day just a little more perfect . . .  
  
As the last words swarm through her mind, she realizes that she is clutching the necklace with her right hand.  
  
Vaughn watches from behind the tree as she walks slowly down the aisle. He is biting his lower lip and using everything to restrain himself from doing something he will regret later. What do you want to do? Blow her cover? Act like a total fool? His hand is clenched in a fist and is slowly pounding against the trunk of the tree. He can't stand to watch anymore and changes his gaze down to the grass.  
  
Then in the distance, a low rumbling starts. The clouds shift overhead. A huge drop of water falls onto his black shoes. The tension in his hand is released and his head lifts up. At that same exact moment, another drop instantaneously falls down her veil and lands on her cheek. Her thoughts become calm, the voices disappear, and only one memory remains. 


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9  
  
A thunderstorm always reminds her of that day. It has been awhile, but today's events have brought up so many feelings and memories that were stored deep down in her.  
  
She remembers that day. It was a humid sticky day, not the best day for running, but she needed to be out there to clear her head. She usually never dwelled on missions after they were completed. The only time when she let missions get to her was when it was personal, somehow. That last mission was one she would never forget.  
  
Both the CIA and SD-6 had been desperately trying to infiltrate her mother's organization for some time. It was her chance to go and obtain valuable information and bring some people into custody. On that particular mission, she witnessed first-hand how cruel her mother was. Her mother was willing to hurt anyone that got in her way. She was even held at gun-point by her own mother. However, when her mother pulled the trigger, Dixon was the one that suffered. In the midst of chaos, Sydney took aim at the guards, but ended up killing an innocent in the process. She had never made a mistake like that before. She rarely even killed the enemies when they attacked her; her combative skills were only used to knock people out so she could do her job. With dealing with her mother, she simply lost control. The mission was a complete disaster; her partner was injured severely, she took the life of an innocent person, and her childhood images of her mother were ruined forever. She returned feeling like a failure.  
  
There was barely any air while she ran, but she couldn't stop. She had been running what seemed like forever, past the stages of a runner's high and into numbness. Her legs were mechanical and every muscle fiber ached. But she kept going, not wanting to feel anything. Thunder roared from a distance and the sky darkened. The water came down drop by drop mixing with her sweat. The path she was running on began to get slippery. One unconscious step sent her crashing down to the ground. Once there, she wanted to let everything out. She crouched over the ground just staring intensely down into the earth while her mind was miles elsewhere and nowhere at the same time. A pair of black shoes right in front of her made her return to reality.  
  
She didn't even notice him until he was there. Since she arrived for her run, he had been there, watching from afar. He had been watching her take lap after lap around the path just waiting for her to give out, so he could bring her back.  
  
While her body was still on the ground, her head tilted up to see his face. He took a step forward so his umbrella would shield her body from the drops of water that were now coming down faster. He wasn't sure if he should help her up or bend down himself to be at her level. Slowly life returned to her body and she slowly straightened up to stand in front of him. She wanted to fling her body into his arms and collapse there, but stood motionless. She opened her mouth, but no words came out.  
  
He set his umbrella down by his legs so his arms would be free. Just like how he comforted her in the warehouse when she first found out about her mother, he closed the gap between them and encircled his arms around to bring her in. Just as their bodies were about to make contact, she quietly said, " I'm wet."  
  
" It's okay . . . Now I am too," and pulled her into him. Once she felt contact, she knew it was okay to let everything out. The tears, mixed with sweat and rain, soaked through his suit so he could feel it all on his skin. He wrapped his arms around her and she sobbed into his neck. There was a flash of lightening and crackle of thunder, she unconsciously held on tighter for dear life, and he let her. He was like a shield for the rain and for all her pain as well.  
  
When she stopped her crying, she lifted her eyes in search of his own for assurance. When she found his eyes, they weren't looking back at her. They were fixed on the messy strands of hair hanging limp against her forehead instead. He brought one hand up to push the strands away so he could clearly see her beautiful face.  
  
" Thank y . . ." He put a finger to her mouth to silence her. She didn't need to explain anything to him. With a slight pivot of his hand position, he lifted her chin up, and brought his face down closer to her. His lips slowly covered her own. It was so light, his lips felt like moist air. It was the gentlest kiss he'd ever given and she'd ever received. At first, it seemed like he was being cautious that if he was too insistence, she would break at her fragile state. The kiss then deepened as they both forgot about the dangers of this life. As if on cue, there was a clap of thunder, and their lips were suddenly ignited with fire. She fought for breath, but wasn't willing to let go. For those moments, he helped for forget the pain. He helped her remember that there was a future.  
  
How she ever walked away from that kiss the first time was beyond her recollection.  
  
Now as the sky changes above her, there was no longer any doubt in her mind. She turns her gaze towards a tree in the back at the same time he lifts his eyes from his shoes. Sydney knows that he is remembering the same exact memory. She remembers that perfect kiss in the storm and thanks God that she has been given a sign about how to proceed with her future. Their stares are interrupted by the priest.  
  
" Uh, shall we still continue?" the priest questions the bride and groom.  
  
Vaughn holds his breath awaiting for the answer. All eyes are on the couple, and the groom replies " Of course."  
  
With those words, Vaughn gives up all hope. He turns his feet and walk away before he could hear her reply.  
  
A/N: This story was conceived in my head before season two and before we learned so much about Irina. Thanks again to everyone for reading. Sorry if I'm killing you with not resolving this just yet. There is one more chapter and an epilogue. 


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10  
  
Vaughn hurries home in the same fashion he had left; body moving, but mind not aware. When he unlocks the door to his apartment, his mind finally refocuses on reality. Something doesn't feel right. He rounds the corner and sees a light coming from his bedroom. "Is it her?" he questions as his alertness increases. He couldn't believe he let his thoughts drift there. "Why would she be at your house you idiot?" he answers himself.  
  
It is Weiss. He is trying to get Donovon ready for his big move.  
  
The dog immediately rushes away from Weiss and jumps for Vaughn. His stubby little legs doesn't carry him too high up in the air, but he tries his best. He too senses that his little world is going to change very soon. When Vaughn doesn't respond, the cute little pup whimpers at his owner's neglect and slowly waggles back to Weiss.  
  
" It's alright Donny, he's not himself," Weiss says as he pats the little dogs head. Then he directs his attention to his friend. " Well, should I even ask what happened?"  
  
Vaughn doesn't say anything. He looks exhausted. His wet hair is a complete mess. Before he came home from the wedding, he went for a walk to let the rain wash away everything. All the sadness.  
  
" Oookaayy?" Weiss says with an unsure tone. " Whoa, you're soaked. Is it raining out there? Maybe you should clean yourself up."  
  
" Maybe you should leave. . ." Vaughn spits out bitterly. He doesn't mean to lash out at Weiss. He just talks the way he feels.  
  
" Geez. If that's the way you want it. I thought that this may be the last time we'd get to hang out considering. . .but that's fine by me. Have a nice new life . . .come on Donny, we'll come back for your stuff another day when Mr.Cranky is long gone." Weiss heads for the door grabbing Donovan's leash on his way, but Vaughn stops him.  
  
" Eric, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it." Weiss is a big softy and immediately changes his tone.  
  
" Look man, I know what you're going through. But you know Sydney Bristow isn't the center of the universe and her marrying someone else shouldn't be the end of the world. You've got to move on too."  
  
" I know. You're right." That's when he looks around at the suitcases already stacked up nicely in the corner, " That's what I plan to do."  
  
" You should probably clean yourself up and be on your way." Vaughn heads for the shower again, and in half an hour, he is in a clean new shirt and suit.  
  
" My offer to drive you to the airport still stands you know," his loyal friend reminds him.  
  
" Thanks, but I think I'm going to take a taxi. Go alone." He is really going to miss Weiss. They have been buddies since their first year as new trainees for the Agency. " I hope you get that promotion real soon."  
  
" Thanks man." The two guys say their goodbyes and give each other a manly hug. The little pup soon waggles to them and joins the party. Vaughn turns to grab his luggage and heads to the airport.  
  
All during the taxi ride, Vaughn tries desperately not think about Sydney. But nothing seems to be working. He closes his eyes and the image of them two in the mirror is engraved into his mind. He quickly opens them again.  
  
"Alright," he thinks to himself, " just keep yourself occupied and look at other things. . . like the beautiful city of LA, you won't be seeing it much any more." When he turns his head to look out the window, of course they just happen to pass by a wedding dress boutique. "Great!" he thinks, " Okay let's see what's on the other side," and he peers out the right window, only to see a sign with big red letters: " Red wigs for sale," He lets out a snort and chuckles to himself at the irony of it all.  
  
Meanwhile back in his apartment, Weiss finishes packing Donovan's stuff. He walks around the rooms to check everything one last time. He ends up in the kitchen and peers into the fridge to see if there's anything. All of a sudden, there is a pounding on the door.  
  
" It's open man, did you forget something?" he calls out while his head is still stuck in the fridge. He hears the door open, but the person doesn't respond. Weiss whips his head around, "Vau. . ." and his eyes widen as he sees a wet woman in a bridal gown. "Whoa! What are you doing here?"  
  
" Is he here?" she says out of breath.  
  
" Uh, no. He left for the airport already."  
  
" When's his flight?"  
  
" Syd . . .I don't think . . . "  
  
" Was he mad at me?" she asks him with sadness in her eyes.  
  
" No . . .of course not. He wants you to be happy."  
  
" Good . . .Maybe I can still . . ." she turns her heels to run out the door.  
  
As she nears the door, Weiss calls out to her, " I think you should give him the same chance to be happy."  
  
Her demeanor slowly changes as she contemplates what Weiss is trying to tell her. All she thought was about how she needed to find him and hoped that he didn't leave just yet. Now was the first time she truly thought about what's best for him. She decides she needs to think once again as she closes the door behind her.  
  
******************************  
  
Vaughn is waiting for the plane to arrive and tries to read a magazine. But it is a real bore. His mind is still else where and some how reading about the depressing state of the economy doesn't appeal to him. He decides to look at one of the gift stores. He roams around and sees a silver watch. Then his mind starts to go off on its own. The watch is nice. It would be a nice gift for Christmas. I gave Sydney a picture frame for that first Christmas. Sydney's picture would look great in my picture frame. Too bad we never celebrated Christmas together. Ahhhh, stop it.  
  
He gives up and heads back to the waiting area. All of a sudden, out of the corner of his eye, he recognizes a black suit. His eyes travel up the woman's back to see beautiful locks of brown hair. He couldn't believe it. A little part of him still had a glimmer of hope that she would drop everything and catch up with him. His heart starts to pound as his legs pick up speed. He pushes past some people in his way to get to her. He slows down when he is near and taps her on the shoulder. " Syd . . ." only to see a pair of unfamiliar eyes. " Oh, I, uh, I'm so sorry. I thought. . . I thought you were someone else. I'm terribly sorry."  
  
The woman gives him a weird expression, but politely says that it is okay. He just wants to hit himself over the head with a baseball bat. " Now boarding for Barcelona at Gate 22," the loud speaker calls out. "Thank God" he says silently and rushes back to the waiting area. Unfortunately there is an extremely long line by the time he reaches the boarding gate.  
  
Vaughn waits patiently in line as he thinks about how embarrassed he felt a few minutes ago with that woman he mistook for Sydney. Had he always been this scatter-brained when he was her handler? He hoped not. He hoped that her new handler would a good guy, not like Lambert. No scratch that. He hoped that her new handler would be a woman. Yes, a woman. Somehow he doesn't want another man to take the only place he had in her life. While his own thoughts swirled in his head, his ears picked up bits of a neighboring conversation.  
  
" Sydney . . ." a man from behind him says.  
  
" What? Where?" Vaughn let his own words slip out.  
  
" Excuse me?" the man asks.  
  
" You said Sydney."  
  
" Yes. I was just saying to this other lady that I was going to Sydney, Australia after a tour of Europe."  
  
" Oh right. Of course. I hear it's great down there." Vaughn is seriously starting to get frustrated with himself. He is beginning to see and hear things out of no where. Everything reminds him of her. "I really need a drink," he thinks.  
  
Vaughn finally boards the plane and takes his seat in first class. The CIA liked him enough to give him first class ticket. He also got lucky that no one had the ticket next to him. He remembers having to sit in terrible seats on missions with Sydney. The first few missions together, they flew out separately. Then they didn't feel there was a need. They obviously couldn't get seats right next to each other because that was still too risky. She simply took the seat in front of him.  
  
One time she surprised him by slipping a note through the crack between the seats. From then on, that was the way they spent their time on planes. They conversed by passing notes back and forth. They had a lot of fun and found out so much more about each other. He felt like he was in Junior High and was passing notes with the girl he had a crush on. The time they spent together wasn't always serious, sad, or painful. There were great memories too.  
  
He lets out a sigh and closes his eyes trying to calm himself down and clear his head, but all he can hear are giggles coming from the next two seats over. There is a couple whispering, laughing, and cuddling. Vaughn gives them a stare and the woman responds, " Sorry. We'll try to be quiet. It's just that we're on our honeymoon." Just perfect!  
  
" It seems like LOTS of people are getting married today," he says angrily, " Where IS that drink?"  
  
The stewardess quickly returns with his drink. Vaughn takes the glass and pours it all down. Then he asks for another. And another after that. Yes, this is how it's supposed to go in movies, isn't it? The woman goes off and marries someone else, and the man goes to the bar and gets stupidly drunk to numb his broken heart. He isn't drunk yet, but he is getting closer.  
  
The stewardess comes back the third time and hands him a drink with a napkin underneath, but this time she says, " Careful about this one, when you reach the very bottom. . . " and winks.  
  
Vaughn is a little confused. What does she mean? Is she trying to flirt with him? He thinks it's probably just the alcohol taking effect. That's the reason he can't understand the woman. Anyway, he continues to drink, but slower this time. It's an interesting drink. He didn't think he ordered it, but he doesn't care anymore. Once the last drop is down in his system, he sets the drink over the napkin and stares at the glass. The bottom of the glass looks a little dirty, and then he notices. " What the . . " he says as he slides the glass over off the napkin. In light black ink the napkin reads:  
  
The only way my special day could be just a little more perfect, is if the right man was there. He came, but then he left. I wasn't sure before, but now I know. He's the one. I don't want to settle when I can have something greater. I'm still just the same Sydney Bristow, if he'll have me.  
  
He just stares at it, unable to breathe. A light touch grazes his arm. He doesn't turn his head to see, but knows it's her. She settles in the seat next to him and he lets out his held breath. Her hand travels down his arm to his hand and opens his fingers. She intertwines her hand into his and gives it a little squeeze. He squeezes back.  
  
Both their bodies relax and fall back into their seats. They close their eyes to see each other's faces. They are now content and satisfied knowing that when they open their eyes the next time, they will see their soul mates. With his eyes still closed, he finally smiles for the first time in six months. Sensing the curl of his mouth, she is able to truly smile for the first time on her wedding day.  
  
And they simply stay like that. Just smiling.  
  
  
  
A/N: Thanks for reading this whole thing. You didn't seriously think that I wasn't going to let Sydney marry someone else? Thanks for reading. The story can end here. For those of you who like it as is, that's the end. = )  
  
But I did write an epilogue with more of a conclusion. I mean, they just can't go off happily ever after into the sunset on the plane right? He has a new job and she left a mess at the wedding. 


	11. Epilogue

Epilogue  
  
The sunlight shines through the thin satin curtains and plays with Sydney Bristow's lashes, forcing her to open her eyes. Her forehead scrunches in annoyance because she doesn't want to wake up from last night's dream. It was perfection and she wants to savor it forever. The edges of her lips slowly curl into a smile as she remembers that it wasn't a dream. No, it wasn't. It was real. More real than anything she has ever felt. It seemed like forever for her to get here with him.  
  
They had played the game for so long. Timing was never on their side. When he was ready, she was ready to go marry someone else. When she was ready, he was ready to start over half way across the world. Their chance almost slipped away. Almost. But the thought of losing each other forever to memory was too much for either one of them.  
  
As they sat on the plane with their eyes closed, mouths smiling and hand in hand, time seemed to stop. They didn't seem to notice their surroundings. As the plane started to descend into the airport, the sudden realization, that they couldn't just go off happily ever after together, hit. Their brief moment of bliss ended. He had a new job that he couldn't just turn down now; she couldn't just leave the mess of a ruined wedding behind and SD-6 without explanation. As all the people on the plane filed out, they just sat there. Regretting that she didn't take the opportunity to tell him everything and knowing that she was suppose to get right back on another plane, she felt tears coming on uncontrollably.  
  
" Shhhh, I know" he took her in and tried to calm her fears. " Hey," he lifted her chin up to make her look at him. " It's only the beginning for us. . . promise," and he brought her fingers up to his mouth.  
  
And it was only the beginning. She returned home thinking about his promise the whole way. It gave her strength to face all the questions, worries, and confusion from those she left behind for a moment to chase after her own happiness. She was fortunate to have understanding friends who understood not to ask too much. Her father was just glad that she didn't settle in the end. The only truly disappointed one was the man who wasn't quite perfect for her. Her apologizes were no match for his anger from humiliation.  
  
She walked away from her last fight with Andrew filled with guilt and self- loathing. He didn't deserve it. But neither did she. If they did end up married, it wouldn't have lasted. It would have ended up even uglier because her heart would have always been across the ocean. As her shaky hands opened the door to her home, her head hung down because of an overwhelming flood of loneliness. She lifted her head to see an angel statuette on her kitchen counter. How did he always know exactly when she would need a reminder of hope?  
  
The little gifts came in the mail every few weeks. Each one always came with an anonymous letter reminding her that one day, the game will end and they will both be the victors. Whenever she came back from a mission, the day after she would receive a postcard of congratulations and good work. On certain occasions did she actually hear his voice posing as a stranger who dialed the wrong number. Above all, she looked forward to missions to Europe where sometimes there were chances to escape for secret rendezvous. It kept her going. Fighting to bring an end to SD-6 so they could be together. Truly together.  
  
After two years of loneliness during the day, heavenly dreams at night, and hopes for the future, she returned from a mission, but there was no postcard the next day. She started going into panic mode. She waited for the mail the day after and still there wasn't anything. She stayed by the phone wishing for a wrong number, but no luck. She called Weiss; he hasn't heard anything. This must be a cruel joke, and she told herself that she wouldn't forgive him.  
  
By the third day, she hadn't eaten or slept. Everyone started getting worried about her sickly complexion. From the advice of her father, she finally got herself to get up and take a walk. Her body carried her all over the place unconsciously. As her fingers traced the railing of the pier, she remembered their first physical contact. As she slumped down at the big chair at the train station, she remembered him telling her all the places he went to look for her. As she walked on the grass of the park, she remembered the pain, the rain storm, and that first kiss. She closed her eyes as she sat down on the bench trying to remember the sensations.  
  
She sensed someone standing over blocking the sunlight.  
  
" Congratulations."  
  
For some reason, she didn't dare look up.  
  
" Good work."  
  
She swallowed down the lump in her throat.  
  
" It's all over."  
  
A tear simply rolled down her closed eyes and stayed on bottom of her quivering chin.  
  
" Syd." Before he finished her whole name, she suddenly stood up and flung her arms around his neck. She let out everything she had stored inside since the day they met. They held on to each other tightly and stood there until the sun started to set.  
  
Now she can't fight the sunlight any longer and lets her eyes flutter open. She feels his arm flop down around her waist to grab her hand that lay on her stomach. At the same time, he brings his nose close to her neck. He kisses her collarbone and she giggles and then sighs in content.  
  
" I was wondering when you would wake up sleepyhead," he whispers in her ear.  
  
" Hmmmmm?"  
  
" Open your eyes sweetie," he says as he squeezes her hand and brings it up to her face. She slowly opens her eyes only to see her fourth finger sparkling back at her.  
  
" Do you like it?" He sounds a little impatient. She tries to hide her excitement.  
  
" Well . . . I dunno . . ." she teases with an uncertain tone.  
  
" What?!" he is surprised. This is not the reaction he wanted.  
  
" You just put it on my finger without even asking me . . ." she tries desperately to suppress the oncoming smile.  
  
" That's because I already knew the answer . . ." he says confidently and kisses her temple.  
  
" Really . . ." she rolls her eyes at him. When did he get so sure of himself?  
  
" How do you know I would say yes?"  
  
" Because . . ." he brings her body closer to him under the covers never wanting to let her go. " Third time's the charm . . ."  
  
He holds up her arm straight toward the window as they both admire her hand shimmering in the sunlight. Then they both relax a little knowing that third time is definitely the charm. 


End file.
